Awesome !

  
“Öyküler ancak onları anlatabilecek olanların başından geçer demişti biri bir gün: Aynı şekilde belki tecrubeler de onları yaşayabilecek olanlara sunarlar kendilerini.”


Stories happen only to those who are able to tell them, someone once said. In the same way, perhaps, experiences present themselves only to those who are able to have them.”

Resmim, my picture

I think it is time to share ( a bit)   "my look "   with  u guys

Well, since witches are kinda fascinating me and tarot is one of my passions, i wanted  to apply that concept to my picture : )

(no, i don't have platin nor white hair) :))

Sanirim artik nasil gozuktugumu paylasma zamani ( kismen).

Cadilar bana cok cazip geldigi ve tarot en buyuk tutkularimdan bir tanesi oldugu icin, bu iki konsepti resimde kullanmak istedim.

( hayir, saclarim ne beyaz ne de platin -artik- degil)  :))

Alright ?  : )

it was right to do

When you know!? you've made a right decision but it still gives you pain, is it still right  decision ?
Right decision should make you feel better or  it is enough that " it was right to do " ?


Dogru karar  verdigini bilmene ragmen?! bu sana hala aci veriyorsa bu karar gercekten dogru bir karar midir?
Dogru bir karar sana ayni zamanda kendini iyi hissettirmeli midir yoksa bunun dogru olan birsey olmasi kafi midir?

Opera opera

   I always like opera but this one captivated  me !
  What a voice !


  Operadan her zaman hoslandim ama bu, resmen beni buyuledi !
 Ne ses ama !

Yusuf'u kaybettim...

Bugun, bir arkadasimi yitirdim.

Ustelik daha birkac ay once sohbet ettigimizde, bana hasta oldugunu soylememisti.

Arkadasim olmasinin yani sira, lise askimdi...

Senelerdir gorusmedik ama yine de yuregim acidi...

Uzuntumu tarif etmem mumkun degil,
Mekanin cennet olsun guzel insan...

Kimi erkekler ve igrenc kaşları, Some men and their terrible eyebrows

 I am nothing against to the men grooming eyebrow but some of them are done so bad jobs,it bothers my eyes, i hardly hold myself not to say " let me fix r eyebrow for u " :))
So, Gentlemen; plsss try to be faithful to your natural shape while u grooming ,otherwise u look really ugly ! There are some gorgeous examples below to inspire u ..

Erkeklerin kaş almasina kesinlikle karsi degilim ama bazilari öylesine iğrenç (Ing.farkli yazdim, alinanlar olabilur :)) iş çıkarıyorlar ki " Gel su kaşlarini duzelteyim" dememek icin kendimi zor tutuyorum :)) Lutfen sayin beyler, kaşinizi alirken dogal sekline sadik kalin da karı gibi gözükmeyin!. Ilham vermesi acisindan, asagidaki guzel ornekleri paylasiyorum.

Biliyorum Sana Giden... 

Biliyorum sana giden yollar kapalı 
Üstelik sen de hiçbir zaman sevmedin beni 

Ne kadar yakından ve arada uçurum; 
İnsanlar, evler, aramızda duvarlar gibi 

Uyandım uyandım, hep seni düşündüm 
Yalnız seni, yalnız senin gözlerini 

Sen Bayan Nihayet, sen ölümüm kalımım 
Ben artık adam olmam bu derde düşeli 

Şimdilerde bir köpek gibi koşuyorum ordan oraya 
Yoksa gururlu bir kişiyim aslında, inan ki 

Anımsamıyorum yarı dolu bir bardaktan su içtiğimi 
Ve içim götürmez kenarından kesilmiş ekmeği 

Kaç kez sana uzaktan baktım 5.45 vapurunda; 
Hangi şarkıyı duysam, bizimçin söylenmiş sanki 

Tek yanlı aşk kişiyi nasıl aptallaştırıyor 
Nasıl unutmuşum senin bir başkasını sevdiğini 

Çocukça ve seni üzen girişimlerim oldu; 
Bağışla bir daha tekrarlanmaz hiçbiri 

Rastlaşmamak için elimden geleni yaparım 
Bu böyle pek de kolay değil gerçi... 

Alışırım seni yalnız düşlerde okşamaya; 
Bunun verdiği mutluluk da az değil ki 
 
Çıkar giderim bu kentten daha olmazsa, 
Sensizliğin bir adı olur, bir anlamı olur belki 

İnan belli etmem, seni hiç rahatsız etmem, 
Son isteğimi de söyleyebilirim şimdi: 

Bir geceyarısı yazıyorum bu mektubu 
Yalvarırım onu okuma çarşamba günleri. 



~

I know, the roads allowing me to come to you, is closed
Besides, you never loved me anyway

How close and cliff between
Just like  walls btween us, people, houses

I slept, i woke up, i always thought about you
only you, only your eyes

You, miss "finally"; you 'do-or-die" 
I wouldn't be grow into a man since i felt into this trouble

LAtely i am running from one side to another like a dog
I indeed am an proud person, believe me

I can't recall of drinking a water from half fully glass
and i can not stand with a bread cut on the corner.

How many times i looked at you from the ferry at 5:45 am
Whatever song i hear,was like sung for us

How un-required love can make one's fool
How i did forget that you love somebody else

i attempted some worrisome and childish actions that made you worry
Forgive me and i would never repeat these silliness 

I would do anything not to come cross
Even it wouldn't be that easy...

I will get use to,ttouch you only in my dreams
it is not an underestimated happiness

I might even leave this city,
At least, i would name your absence maybe

Believe me, i would never bother you again,
I can tell you my last wish now ,then

I am writing this letter to you in a middle of the night.
Begging you to read this on wednesdays only...

a slight (!) paradox

I am occultist is enough not to believe everything rational yet rationalist enough not to believe everything occult..
I would like to believe in Homeopathy but when i hear explanations, sounds so bullshit i can not listen till the end.. seriously people..!!

Okult olan herseye inanmayacak kadar mantikli, herseyde mantik aramayacak kadar okultum. Alternif tipi denemek istiyorum ama aciklamalari duyunca ve bunlar son derece sacma salak olunca sonuna kadar dinleyemiyorum.. ne insanlar var..!

Moon Mood

"Is there Full  Moon tonight ?" 

she asked, right before going to check from the window.

There was no Full Moon, actually no Moon at all.
  "it explains the way i feel then..."  she whispered and pulled lace curtain over starless,plum like dark colored sky.

Laid down on her bed, stared at  room from one side to other with no any emotion left, but more like stillness at sea, right before the tide.

Tried to shove that sharp pain tied her heart firmly but, it just made it worse...

Sat on her bed.
Her back was again troubled due sleeping on the same side,every night.

" So, what was the point ?" 

i think i just like to feel this way time to time to feel alive again...

It is still too early to sleep anyway.

but

Good night moon..."

Pak

  Biri de çıkıp demiyor ki ;

'Ben seni aldatırım,agzina da sicarim '

Hepsi,

Nur'dan mamul,

Zemzemle yikanmıs,

Hepsi,

Pir'u pak. :))))


PAK deyince,Pakistan geldi aklima;  Pak bir ulke oldugundan mi pakistan acaba,alla alla ..

Hoscakal Berkin - Farewell Berkin

Dun bir fidani yitirdik,

"Rahata erdi,Tanri sevdiklerini once goturur"  demistir kimileri , bir de feryad eden anasina sormak lazim...

Hissettigim uzuntuyu tarif etmeye kelimeler.

Umut dolu bakan gozlerin icimi acitiyor cocuk...

Pisi pisine,hain adice bir saldirayla yasaminin elinden alinmasi icimi acitiyor cocuk...

Cocuklugunun calinmasi icimi acitiyor...

Seni katledelerin hala ortalikta gezinmesi icimi acitiyor cocuk.

Anaciginin,dedeciginin gozyaslari,

Seni anmak isteyen insanlara alcakla saldirilirmasi,

Bunlari yaziyor olmak,

Icimi acitiyor cocuk...

Huzur icinde uyu Berkin !



Yesterday,we have lost a boy as young as a flower.

Some might say " He is peace now,God takes beloved ones first "  this should be asking to his mom who was screaming with the pain this morning..

There is no such a word can describe the sadness i have.

Your eyes  full of hopes hurts my heart, kid...
Hurts my heart that your childhood is taken from you with betray and for nothing.
Hurts my heart that your killers walking around freely, kid...

Tears of your mommy and your grandpa's,
People whoever is there for your memory,getting attacked,
and writing these,

it hurts my heart ,kid.

Rest in peace Berkin ...

Last dream... Son ruya.

“I wish you to know that you have been the last dream of my soul...

Since I knew you, I have been troubled by a remorse that I thought would never reproach me again, and have heard whispers from old voices impelling me upward, that I thought were silent for ever. I have had unformed ideas of striving afresh, beginning anew, shaking off sloth and sensuality, and fighting out the abandoned fight. A dream, all a dream, that ends in nothing, and leaves the sleeper where he lay down, but I wish you to know that you inspired it."

"Ruhumun  son ruyasi oldugunu bilmeni isterdim..."

Seni tanigimdan beri, bir daha asla tatmayacagimi sandigim bir pismanligin sıkıntısındayim, ve   daima sessiz kalacagini dusundugum ileriye sevkeden eski seslerin fisiltilarini duyuyor gibiyim.Sekilsiz fikirlerimin yeniden zorlayisi, yenidenin baslangici,miskinligin silkelenisi ve şehvet, ve terkedilmis bir kavganin kavgasi. Bir ruya, hepsi bir ruya, hicbirseyin bitmedigi, ve uykucuyu uzandigi yerde birakir gibi bir ruya, keske ilham verdigini bilebilseydin.''

It has been a long time that i didn't write.Sorry folks !

While i am scattered by nostalgic songs and struggling with my coming history, feel free to email me:

sttiretella@gmail.com

Be back !


Uzun zaman olmus yine yazmayali dostlar,kusura bakmayin !

Ben nostaljinin ruzgarinda savrulurken,yazmak isterseniz  sayet,asagidaki adresten bana ulasabilirsiniz.

sttiretella@gmail.com

Geri gelecegim !

back after a while !

It has been a while (Thanks to my exams ) but i am back now !

In a rush of searching a piece from my lovely memories (it's something about winter nites i swear!).
I found nothing to digging to  my previous friendships,platonic crushes,neither relationships.
I am about think,i screwed many people ( well,literally !) :)))

Sigh...i am really wishing to have this black eyed boy somewhere near to me sometimes.... 

Very soon,i am gonna be back with my first phrase from my novel that i started to write a while.

Stay tune  ! :)

Bana birseyler anlat Baba.
Masal da olur hikaye de,
Yeter ki birseyler anlat...

Tell me something dad.

Either a tale or a story,

Just tell me something dad...

Finally ! i made it !!

I don't know why i couldn't enter for a while but problem solved for now !

Couple of days ago,i found my ex-bf (Irish) on linkdn. then all the memories came to my mind.
Well,to be honest,i don't remember much but there were good times  :))

Whole night,i listened to  Mazzy Star's ' Fade into You"  then all nostalgic moments followed after (Sigh...).

It's possible to love of being love rather than a loving that person.You know what i mean ..
You love the feeling of flying butterflies in your stomach, first touch,first kiss,first 'love  you blah blahs '.
(well ,yeah,i have a teenager soul..! : )))
I might even describe it as " love addiction"  but not uncontrolable,trust me.

Well, for this kind of people, i wouldn't suggest to get married!
Love survives for 2yrs,then habit,friendship is left (if you're lucky even an ordinary sexlife but nope,not the exciting one) :))

Somehow Winter hasn't arrived to Belgium yet,still waiting  : ))

Even if it is not raining,the weather is depressive anyway,which causes you to be more melancholic.


   Maybe i should prepare a radio program,really...pfff

I want to hold the hand inside you
I want to take a breath that's true
I look to you and I see nothing
I look to you to see the truth
You live your life
You go in shadows
You'll come apart and you'll go blind
Some kind of night into your darkness
Colors your eyes with what's not there.

Fade into you
Strange you never knew
Fade into you
I think it's strange you never knew

A stranger's light comes on slowly
A stranger's heart without a home
You put your hands into your head
And then smiles cover your heart

Fade into you
Strange you never knew
Fade into you
I think it's strange you never knew

Fade into you
Strange you never knew
Fade into you
I think it's strange you never knew
I think it's strange you never knew